Word of the Year: Connect

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my word for this year is

connect

before this summer,
before the writing and touring,
i didn’t realize how much i held back
how much i guarded and protected myself

the truth is,
i have spent most of my life hiding

i am still the shy kid
who couldn’t raise her hand in class
and hung out in groups of three
so she could listen not talk

as an adult,
i run meetings,
work, work, work,
put myself in charge,
give a speech,

to avoid hanging out

i go to events
pretend to mingle
leave as early as possible

before we left on tour,
a friend asked, 
“what are you thinking?”
you are scheduling 60 events for yourself

but it was easy to be on tour -
unlike a band,
we performed one hour before,
one hour after each screening
then we retreated to the safe RV

but my heart is opening

this summer, night after night
we shared our art
exposed our soul
stood on stage to be judged
by sixty audiences
thousands of people

and instead of mocking our misfit, introverted spirits
they claimed solidarity, unity
shared their own broken souls
and gave us a collective hug

people are more loving, sensitive,
and willing to be vulnerable
than i ever expected

for every person who has reached out to me this year:
audiences, blog readers, friends, family,
i am thankful
i couldn’t do any of this
without each one of you…

my heart is expanding,
learning and growing
i’m finding that people are to be trusted,
and that i can learn from each person’s story

so this year, i will intentionally,
with courage,

connect

~•~

Thank you all,

♡ Annie

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